When you’re down and really need a smooth talker…that’s when people are snobs.
When you really need that strange friend…that’s when strangers too turn snobs.
You’re cold, desperate and running low on confidence and self-belief…that’s when the world of snobs unites against you.
The rain comes down and you need shelter and you never find one…that’s a confirmation that the forces of snobs are working against you.
And then you pause and think. I wish the animal kingdom were my friends and I could play with the worms and narrate my sorrow to the birds and cry with the pups.
Yes, I am in pain, yes I want to tell it to the world, yes I want to whine and brag about it; yes I want to be just the way I am. A new year has begun some say you can win this year, throw all your sorrows aside and face the new things that will come your way. Even though words are comforting, friends and family encourage you it’s not always enough. Being part of a series of unfortunate events will always play in the back of ones mind. How can one let go of being betrayed and misunderstood, guess very few and am certainly not one of them.
This is my story, 2008 was shaping out to be a good year for me, and I did a lot of exciting stuff and met a lot of exciting personalities too. But just when a climax was drawing I was backstabbed and shaken with a life-lesson.
The working life of an individual is the most important; one learns to earn his/her bread and butter, earns his contacts, builds his network of associates and tries his best to achieve what he/she aims in life. Sometimes the goals may seem impossible or imaginary but then whose father what goes, right? At 23, I wasn’t ready to learn a life-lesson of the measure that I did and I was clearly taken aback when it did dawn upon me. I was humiliated and accused by my team leader of being a person with attitude problems but I thought having ones attitude was good, wonder why TANTRA and other tees have got them all over? Unless one was growing into something unbearable and affecting relations at work. Jokes apart I was a bit surprised at this considering I have very good rapport with most people at my work place and even fake it well to put up with the ones I totally dislike. Next accusation that was bought against me was I mix pleasure with business and I was taken aback when I heard the reasons they gave me. “Being too friendly is not good, you are sending out the wrong signal and that’s not good for the company.” What the fuck does that mean?
Being an associate of the media world one has to have good contacts to get work done, if one wants to that is. And I don’t see the harm is sharing a light conversation after a tiring game, so then what’s wrong is telling a player, “well played” or “tough luck, good luck for the next game”. Both of these dialogues bring a smile even if fake on the persons face. Is that called mixing business with pleasure. Besides what business is it of anyone what I do during my non-work hours. Not like I am part of a scandal and I have taken the headlines of the all papers.
I refused to accept the second accusation bought against me, I have a clear conscience and it doesn’t prick me at all. The work guys obviously had no documentation or any sort of prove to show, seeing is believing they say! In my case it was pure hearsay. I sobbed for 3 hours in front of my organization CEO, HR and the person who backstabbed me my former team leader for whom I have lost all faith and respect.
After the episode was done with I got an apologetic text from the woman who ruined my peace of mind saying that whatever that happened wasn’t PERSONAL. I was surprised for her choice of words; didn’t she already cause personal damage to me when baseless accusations were bought against me in front of the CEO?
Then came Christmas, I would want to forget the 2008 Xmas as soon as possible because it was the dullest and the saddest one ever in my life. The CEO wanted me to rethink if I had a future with them and if I wanted to come back and work for them. I had a clear conscience and of course I didn’t want to come back to a place where one is seen more like a burden to the company but then was it the right thing to do? RECESSION has struck the market not having a job wasn’t going to be the end of the world, I am only 23! And 3 people thinking or wanting to think that I was an idiot wasn’t going to harm me in anyway even if one of them happen to be the CEO.
Opinions are like asses everybody’s got one, so said someone. I came determined to prove these suckers that I am an asset to the organization. And well they did give me a new role for the New Year, they added me part of the Business Team and I have a profile that says I am going to be the driver for all football accounts that the organization will have, sounds heavy, doesn’t it? But it’s not, at least so far!
I can go on and on perhaps even write a thesis about this life-lesson episode and about how the peace was ruined and how I didn’t have a jolly Christmas and more bla bla blab la…and of course you have no time to read once plight. I had fallen victim to jealousy and hearsay, at least that’s what most people have concluded for me and I have learnt that people who are the “yes men/woman” and “asslickers” actually get places but not too far am sure. A believer of the supreme power I know that better things awaits me and everyone who goes through a tough time. This episode has got me closer to prayers and to believe that God actually does exist.
I hold no grudge against the person who made me go through turmoil but then I guess what goes around comes around sooner or later. May god be the best judge here!
